HOW DARE YOU CANCER!

How dare you; Disrupt the life of a beautiful woman.

That gave her no choice but to except the poison in her veins.

To have her sit or lay for hours sleeping or looking at IG and how her friends were enjoying themselves.

That made her bald and nauseous.

That caused her to pull over on the parkway to vomit.

That caused her to cry out in the middle of the night because of painful neuropathy that irreversibly curled her fingers.

That made her sit for almost an hour on the toilet because, although she felt that she needed to pee, it wouldn’t come.

That changed her bowel habits from very regular to haphazard.

That caused her to look in the mirror and see the integrity of her skin change for the worse.

That caused her toe nails to lift where only one worker at the nail salon knew how to handle her feet with extra care during her pedicures.

And the devastation she felt when he left.

That gave her painful mouth sores.

How dare cancer cause her so much anxiety.

The “why me”. The articles that she read which stated life expectancy 3-5 years. Period.

The anguish she expressed getting out of the car at Sloan and me not being able to accompany her because of covid.

The fatigue she suffered with on a daily basis.

So tired she often couldn’t respond to texts.

Cancer, how dare you cause her to have a totally different outlook on life.

Too wake up every day just wanting to survive.

Sticking to the chemo protocol.

Never unwavering.

When alone, what she must have been thinking, in between trying to think positively.

With no one to comfort her, only pills.

How dear you grow and spread without her knowing and cause so much mayhem to this beautiful soul.

Causing her untimely death.

That’s the struggle.